Updated: Oct 23, 2019
Did you ever say anything at the workplace that you regretted afterwards?
I did. A few years back. And at that time, I obviously didn’t measure the truly meaning of these two small words: “too late”.
Did you also happen to be told “calm down” and it actually made things worse for you?
The difference between that fateful day and today is that I learnt to understand what anger is, what triggers it and how to manage it. Not easy of course, but doable.
I find that controlling your anger is not so much about having years of seniority (the older you are the better you control your anger), but more about first acknowledging your anger, to then know what to do with it.
My best advice: Ask yourself the type of questions that help you define your anger and develop a positive goal for managing it:
• Who or what triggered my anger?
• What are the underlying emotions of my anger, fear, frustration, and hurt?
• Is there a possibility I may have overreacted?
• Am I focusing my anger on the right target?
• Is there an alternative explanation for the triggering event?
• How can I use my anger in a positive way?
Same as politics, the workplace is full of triggers for anger. Workplace anger is a normal reaction when circumstances are unjust, personal rights aren't respected, promises are broken, or expectations aren't met.
But remember, too late is too late, and expressing your anger inappropriately can cause you to do and say things that you'll regret!